My SO hardly ever says it first. He usually says “I love you too” in response to me. but he has a horrible loveless background with cold hearted parenting, so it is difficult for him to verbalize now.
He shows me in other ways how much he loves me tho. he tells me that I have changed his life for the better, and very often says he doesn’t think he would be alive today if I hadn’t come into his life. He also frequently says, “Everything good I have done in my life was done with you.”
He shows much appreciation for even the smallest things I do for him, and he constantly surprises me with amazing outings to places I would not have seen otherwise, and surprise gifts.
He never shies away from a hug or a kiss from me, and responds in kind every time even tho he does not intitiate them often.
Just then other day he looked at me and told me he loved me, then said “I just noticed that I don’t say it first very often. I need to work on that.” That meant the world to me. Since he doesn’t say it much, it was much more special when he said it out of the blue.
I would like to hear it more often, but his actions speak volumes, so that’s ok with me.