@spontaneous_adjective – No, those are girls with low self-esteem and lots of issues. If that’s who you’ve been trying to attract and are failing, then you need to talk to different types of women.
@men – Don’t whine about how you’re such a “nice guy”. Think of it this way. If you have to tell a woman as opposed to show a woman that you’re a nice guy… eh… you’re probably not such a nice guy. A decent man listens, and yet has his own opinions. He has hobbies and interests and he’s cool with her having her own hobbies and so on. He’s not checking where she is every minute of the day. He treats her with kindness and understanding. He’s not possessive. Girls aren’t cars.
He doesn’t put their private business in the locker room with any “wink wink nudge nudge” stuff.. He doesn’t care whether or not the other guys in his clique find her attractive. He’s not going after a particular girl to impress his buds. He is honest with her about his feelings, and can tell her what those are in a kind way.
In other words, he treats her how he’d like to be treated by her.
That’s what mature, attractive girls dig.