Surely you can urge him on while in the act? You kind of gutterally tell him “fuck me. fuck me hard. harder!” You’re looking in his eyes and you want to whip him into a kind of angry shape. You might insult him a bit. “You call that a fuck?!? Show me your cock, man! Make my fucking pussy sore!”
He’s a man, right? He’s controlling? He can’t let you get in control, as you would be if you’re the one telling him to go at it.
Then, if he still needs more urging, get him going a bit, and then grab his nipples and twist them hard. Scratch his sides, like spurring a horse on. Wrap your legs around him and push at him as hard as you can. Maybe try to roll on top and make him fight you to keep you underneath. Maybe ever roll him off the bed. Anything to get his blood up.
You could also give him a nice fantasy before hand. Tell him you want him to walk in the door and as soon as he sees you, demand a blow job. Tell him you need him to fuck your face. Then fall down and pull him down on top of you, cock still in your mouth and grab his ass and make him fuck your mouth there on the floor. Tell him that’s how you want it. Beg him for it. Tell that while you really appreciate his concern for you, and his need to love you gently, you need him to show you how much he really wants you. You need him to use you.
Of course, you talk about it before hand because it’s a game, and you don’t want the game to get out of hand. You set rules to keep you both safe. The rules actually let you go wild, because you know the boundaries.
Can you tell something about my fantasies? LOL. My wife is a nice, good girl who doesn’t want to play games. She just wants nice love. Which is cool. But still… fantasies….