I read a book written by a therapist once that said later in therapy he would sometimes confront his patient in some way to see how they respond (to a criticism or suggestion).
I usually dress up, and I mean in dresses and nice stuff. The one day, and only one day I went to therapy in sweatpants I was having a medical procedure at the hospital and didn’t want to be all dressed up but wear something comfy. They usually make you take things off anyway. Sure enough she said something about my change in appearance. I remembered the book though and thought she was using it as an opportunity to “confront” me as a test. I just nodded and agreed with her that I had not dressed as I normally do. She insinuated this dramatic change in the lack of care in my dress might be a sign I was slipping into a depressed phase. She made bonkers big deal out of it. I agreed she was so very right and next time I was going to do better.
But the next time I came in I was dressed up like a drag queen on crack, because I am a real smart ass that way. I had on a prom gown and lipstick put on horribly. Yes, she has a file on me miles thick. She started scribbling on her pad while I laughed really hard, and she raised an eyebrow and said “Thank you for making….an effort. You seem a little manic.”
Thanks doc.
They just don’t get my sense of humor. I’m not crazy, really.
Other than that one time, I have no problem with her. She does stop and correct me. If I say “I’m an idiot” she will instantly tell me to stop putting myself down, or connect a few dots from previous sessions and remember my mother said that to me all the time. She will basically give me a lecture about “negative self talk”. Or if I describe an argument with someone she might suddenly decide to work on communication skills or “I messages” or something, so that I can learn to handle things better. She usually does a good job and I like her.
I’ve had the silent type before, the kind that just make faces and write notes. I don’t find them very helpful. My therapist comes out and says things. I don’t have to make insinuations. She comes out and says what she thinks. I’ve often wondered if the silent scribbler was more Freudian or something.