@Heartbroken Okay… the carrot won’t work…
Grow a spine of some sort. You are not the only one to have felt this way, and you won’t be the last. Look at yourself with more respect will ya? Look at you: “Oh I’m nothing without him…”
I’ll tell you what you’re supposed to do. Self pity will only get you so far – but I know that it’s necessary. So do it. Wallow in self pity – but do it knowing this is temporary.
Time heals all wounds blah blah blah – it’s true. That’s it. I thought I’d never get through the hardships – but you do. Because after some time apart you just realize at one point… what the frak am I doing? Why am I so miserable, and everyone around me keeps going as if life is okay? Then you start to see life is okay. And then you can be a working individual producing worth in society again.
So in conclusion – the way to stop feeling the way you do – is to do something else.
1. Ignore him – don’t even talk to him till you’re over this ‘phase’.
2. Go out with friends, you still have friends right?! Use them to help. My best friend came over and played video games with me every night so I wouldn’t have my mind wandering. Invite a girlfriend, watch movies, talk, whatever the hell girls do.
3. When you’re ready – start to go out. I don’t know how you find men, or hell even if you’re of drinking age. But assuming you are – go to the bars and get back to the ‘scene’. You know when I got over my ex? When I walked into a club and a presumably tipsy girl just came up and kissed me (and stole me away to hide from her friends trying to get her off of me). Not my proudest moments in hindsight, but hey – it opened my eyes and it dawned on me… ‘god damn I’m a sexy man beast’ (otherwise known as the typical male ego/narcissistic tendencies flaring up) – But you know what? I lost that flame during my long relationship, but ever since I got it back, that’s one thing I have not lost since. Find your Beyonce ‘fierce’ and get going.
And lastly – think hard into whether you really ‘love’ him or not. I see the word ‘love’ being thrown around like a sure-thing pickup line at a dive bar. Real love takes time to develop, a real caring. Just because he makes you feel all warm and cuddly inside doesn’t make ‘love’, well it makes love, but not the love we’re talking about…