Let’s back up a bit. Why would a person remain with a liar? I do agree that there are different types of lies (like ones to avodi causing someone unnecessary pain, for instance), and there are those who continuously, compulsively lie over shit that doesn’t even matter. Essentially, this shouldn’t even be a problem. Do you agree?
At any rate (and to sound totally contradictory just for the fun of it) there have been a few times in the course of our 12 years together that my husband has lied to me, and it was over finances. In his culture, it’s the men who are to handle those things while the women stay barefoot and pregnant in the kitchen. So we had to come to terms with that, first. I feel it’s worth it to mention cultural differences, even though it doesn’t apply to everyone.
However, almost every culture agrees that lying is NOT okay. I was able to work through it with my husband by appealing to his sense of decency, and his sense of right and wrong. If he didn’t have those things, the marriage would have failed.
You have to draw the line somewhere. You either end up settling for a liar, which means you sold yourself out (and you end up enabling this person WHILE you are settling for second best, which means you are putting out massive effort toward making things right in your life without the person who supposedly loves you does little to nothing) or you end up moving on.
In the end, very few people can answer this question without also being reminded that they compromised both thier dreams, AND what they are worth. That this question implies is that we ended up settling not for what we wanted, but much less. Why has this become okay, might be the better question :)