I put myself in timeout once when my son was little (about 4–5). I told him that mommy needed a timeout and that I was going in my room for the timeout. Our rules during timeout are that you are not allowed to talk unless it’s an emergency. I told him that if he needed me he could come get me and that I would be in my room. He took it pretty seriously.

If I needed longer to calm myself, I would make arrangements for him to go to a friend or family member’s house for a little bit (not just Grandma). Now that he’s a bit older (8), I can tell him that mommy needs a few minutes to herself and he’ll respect that (he still knows he can come get me if something is wrong).

I would let her invite a friend over, give them flat sheets and the let them build in the dining room. They amuse themselves, you get a few minutes away. If there’s story hour at the library, take her to that.

Get out of the house in a non-shopping situation. Take her to the playground, walk around the neighborhood, take the car to the carwash, and let her watch it go through, go to a cemetery with a pond and let her feed the ducks, that sort of thing.

If you’re home with with her 24/7, you need to make sure that you are giving her chances to learn how to amuse herself and play without depending on interaction with you. Sometimes this means your house will be a mess. Things like cardboard boxes, craft supplies, etc. facilitate self-play.

We had a brief period where we would all lay down in our rooms for 30 minutes and listen to audio CDs from Classical Kids—Beethoven Lives Upstairs, The Magic Flute, Bizet’s Dream, Tchaikovsky Discovers America, etc. Those were good at bedtime. We also had the Little Thinker tapes, which were descriptive stories of scenes which prompted the listener to stop and draw a picture of the scene, then start the tape back up when they finished the picture, and draw the next scene.

I found that periods when my children were the most frustrating were usually followed by a big developmental change. Also, for some reason, there seemed to be a cycle of six months of being Miss Cranky Pants, six months of being St. Angelica. I really think it’s a developmental thing. Focusing on that helped me endure.

Headphones. music or no music…....your choice. this way, you can WATCH your “little darlin” without having to LISTEN. soooooooothing on the nerves.

I make them go outside for awhile. Then I sit down and work on my rules of punctuation, or I vacuum (very soothing), or I eat something I don’t feel like sharing. Stuff that’s private and self-indulgent.

Put them in the car and go somewhere – then in the backseat (in their car seat) and you in the front. Go to the bathroom and have a wee cry. Put something you both enjoy on t.v. and sit quietly for a time watching it.

Cry. Eat. Call my husband at work. Put a pillow over my head. Stick one of his favorite movies in as long as he isn’t being straight up bad (don’t judge me, it’s better than strangling him to death!), sit outside and relax while he runs rampant, give him some activity where he has to sit at the table for a while (drawing, coloring, play doh), ask him what he’d like to do.

You can always find a doctor willing to diagnose them with ADD or something like that and put them on zombie-pills like so many burnt-out moms do. That slows them down.

@zophu It takes two to tango. In the case you’re speaking of, it takes three, usually. The mother and the father as well as the doctor. All should be in agreement when putting a child on the drug. It’s not just “burnt out moms”. In fact, I’d say more times than not, the doctor diagnoses ADD and suggests drugs before any other therapies. I don’t know that many moms (or parents, to be more accurate and less sexist) go into the office thinking, “I need a break, I think I’ll drug up my kids with psychotropics.”

@ubersiren Maybe “whispering” my posts doesn’t ease their bluntness much. Regardless, plenty of parents walk into doctor’s offices with desires for quick-fixes for their kids; and like you say doctors are more than willing to write them a permission slip to dope their children. Parents usually trust their kids’ doctors without much research or other qualified opinions.

I’m the grandma, and I am always open for them to bring the kids over. One thing Sonny does is take the kids to the local 24 hour fast food place which has an indoor play area, for the price of a salad and a few french fries, some relief.

Also, driving around late at night usually works. I wonder how many people are out driving around the city streets because of kids who won’t go to sleep.

I also let them go in the shower or the bathtub and spray each other. The older one can just reach the kitchen spray, so I put towels on the floor and let him stand at the sink and play with several plastic containers and the water.

@YARNLADY, what a fun grandma you are! Your grandkids will remember that forever. My kids always remember taking a piece of refrigerator carton cardboard and surfing (sitting) down her carpeted basement steps.

When my youngest was 2, 3, 4 and 5 he had a really hard time controlling his temper. He’s the kid who Ross Greene describes as The Explosive Child.

When things got really hairy I would put a movie on for him/them. Then go and listen to some loud music to calm down.

I’m happy to say that he is 1000x better now (he’s 10).

@zophu Oh, I see. I can never tell if someone is whispering on my computer for some reason.