I have always been a bit hypersensitive to loss. I have cried at the funerals of people that I’ve never even met. I have also been known to cry, or at the very least feel that deep sadness, if someone that I only knew marginally well has passed away. For me the issue is that I feel so badly for those who ARE closest to the deceased that it just overwhelms me. Such is the case of funerals where I didn’t personally know the person who had passed away. I see the friends and family that are so distraught over their own loss that it makes ME sad.
Having said that, sometimes it’s a great attribute. I have worked with hospice for 4 years, and the most common thing that I hear from families is that my ability to connect with them and with their loved one is what makes me so good at what I do. I’m often told by people around me that it’s an overreaction, but I disagree. I think that it’s important to remember that someone close to the deceased is grieving, and feeling for their sadness only shows a respect for life and love.
Of course, death is also very final. It’s easy to wonder “what if?” What if I had spoken to that person now? What if we had become very close? What if things had been different? Those questions can be nagging sometimes when you realize the time has passed for it to be possible.