My mom is a chain smoker and refuses to restrain herself around others, even her grandchildren. She’s very self-centered. She’s always done the least work possible to contribute to the family… unless it’s something she enjoys. She used to spend what little money we had on whatever hobby had manifested of late- she still does this and I worry about her and my dad’s retirement. She’s never supportive of her children’s decisions, unless it’s something she personally approves of or has had a hand in, and meddles in their lives- parenting, relationships, eating habits, yet she’s not attentive to her own. All that effort to judge and meddle, and she rarely asks if we’re happy, what’s going on with us, how our jobs are going, about other family and friends. We can drive the 2.5 hrs to see her after months of not seeing her and if it’s not about food or her latest hobby, she will act disinterested in talking about anything until given the opportunity to change the subject to something she enjoys. Most other discussions turn into her giving unwelcome advice on stuff she has no idea about. She spares no feelings, even of those she is supposed to love.
Thanks for letting me get that out. If I don’t once a month, I’ll turn into a pumpkin. It took me a long time to figure out why I don’t get along with her very well, and it’s good to remind myself so I know what to ignore when I visit. I don’t hate my mom, but distance definitely makes the heart grow fonder. That’s fonder, believe it or not.
The only thing that bugs me about my dad is that he puts up with my mom and doesn’t stand up for himself. He works his ass off for her, and she treats him like an employee a lot of the time, rather than a husband. He’s a fucking saint.
I’m done complaining, I swear.