“Suck it”? Really? I think that at his age, he’s picked that up from someone or something he shouldn’t have had access to. I’d have a chat with his parents. They have to find out where he got this from just to make sure no one is exposing him to things he’s too young to understand. And the violent streak? My first assumption with all of that is that he’s acting out. Someone may be hurting him, and his parents need to find out if that’s happening.

As far as I know my son has never done this and he’s 8 now. Are his parent’s aware of his behavior? If not, someone needs to talk to them and let them know what’s going on. If they are aware of it and they aren’t doing anything to stop it, I’d keep my children away from the boy as much as possible.

As far as I know, it’s not too uncommon for kids to do a “show you mine if you show me yours” type of thing, but what you’re describing is different, especially with the language he’s using. He obviously picked it up from somewhere and sometimes actions like this can be a sign of sexual abuse or just bad parenting. It doesn’t seem “normal” to me at all…

I remember a little boy showing me his penis when I was young, probably before first grade. Somehow my parents found out and I wasn’t allowed to play with him ever again. I honestly didn’t understand why not at that age. You’ve probably done all the right things in not allowing her to play with him anymore and she will understand at some future time. Also, you say he has a violent streak, so it’s best she isn’t near him even if he wasn’t exposing himself.

My nephew, when he was 4 would tell people he had a dinosaur in his pants. That’s normal.
But what this kid did is weird. “Suck it”? He said that? Talk to his parents, and keep your children from playing with this boy. I don’t blame you for being furious.

@aprilsimnel @Seaofclouds The parents are very young and the little girl talks about how her dad drinks all the time. I hear them yelling quite a bit. The girl was at our house when my daughter told me. She saw how upset I was and when I asked if her dad was home she started to cry. I’m afraid their parenting skills aren’t the best. Would I make it worse for them if it is the parents that might be doing something?

Luckily we are moving soon, so we won’t have to deal with it much longer. I feel so bad for these kids.

It does not seem right. I would confront the parents. Maybe they don’t know about it. If nobody brings it to their attention . Well it will never get corrected.Gossip will just continue. I think you or somebody talk to the parents. He probably heard it from TV or a movie by accident. I hope. Good luck.

Just showing, I think, is pretty common. The addition of “Suck it,” however, made me blink. That raises some alarms for me.

@jonsblond That’s a really tough situation. Is there anyone else you could get involved (maybe a school counselor or even CPS if you are really concerned about their well-being)? It definitely sounds like it could be a bad situation.

Oh, no. You may need to call your town’s CPS to get the children some help.

I remember being 5 or 6 and playing doctor with other children my age, but there were no violent streaks or kids telling me to suck anything. It’s the “Suck it!” part that’s alarming. The vast majority of kids at that age don’t know anything about that unless they’ve been exposed to it from an outside older element, be it a magazine (or now the internet), a movie or a person.

Oh no, I wasn’t concerned until the ‘suck it’ part. A call to your local child protective service is anonymous and I can give you your town/state’s number if you want it.

@april great minds.

We do have a police officer that lives on our street. I’ve known her for years. Maybe if I mention something to her so she is at least aware of the situation?

And no offense to young parents, I was young when I had my sons.

I think it’s a forgone conclusion that the child isn’t playmate material, but I recall being persistent at times with getting neighborhood/friend girls to show me the goods around 1st/2nd grade, but not earlier. One girl I touched mildly (didn’t know what or how anything worked). It’s not something that was influenced by abuse towards me or anything—just spontaneous. Anyway, that’s just to speak to whether it’s common in the hope that the info is helpful.

@jonsblond
yes, you can contact CPS anonymously. I would do things anonymously. I don’t think it’s a good idea to tell the cop on the street unless you want advice on the D.L.

I have a little cousin that is actually worse then that and he got it from his dad, It makes me so mad that parents would allow their children to talk that way or even the parents talking that way in front of their children. I wouldn’t let my daughter play with him or even be around him. And I would go tell the parents, even though it might not do any good but I’d still do it anyway. I think you should report it.

There’s a decent chance he was abused. Violence, inappropriate sexual advances… usually that’s abuse. Pity him, don’t be angry at him. Talk to your own children. Report his behavior to authorities.

I was accosted by children like that growing up a couple times a year in Florida and once in South America. My mom shut that shit down.

To me it would indicate that the child has either witnessed oral sex being performed or has been sexually abused. In your shoes I think I would discuss the situation with the cop who you know and see what she suggests. It should be reported to someone and she could hopefully tell you who and where.

Good thing you’re moving to the country!!!

I have known little boys that age to be fascinated by their anatomy and to be constantly rubbing or rearranging themselves unconsciously. And age five is about the age of “playing doctor.” However, I agree with @rooeytoo – saying “suck it” could be an indication that the child is being molested; that is not at all age appropriate. If the sister cries when you ask if her father’s home, something is definitely not right in that household.

Clearly, he’s not doing it out of malice, he’s just a child…I’d worry a bit about his situation at home, would tell my kids that they should simply say ‘I don’t need to see your penis’ and walk away…I would talk to the child’s parents before I’d run to the police. My son is 4, he has no hang ups about his penis, understands why he has erections and the biological basis behind it and doesn’t show any of his body parts that are covered to anyone. Although, this one time, he randomly pulled his pants down and peed by a tree in the middle of the park. For a moment, I was going to pretend that I wasn’t his mother but then I had to go over there and tell him to pull his pants up. We had a talk and I’m hoping that was the last of public urinating.

I have a solution for you… in my pants.

I guess it is common.