I’m not addicted to caffeine.
I can quit any time I want.
Really.
I can.
It’s not a big deal.
Just because caffeine in coffee and soda is so wonderful, keeps the headaches away, brightens every aspect of my day, that doesn’t mean that I need it.
See? I just typed this whole thing without a single sip of the coffee at my elbow here. ‘Tweren’t nothing.
And now I’m going to have another sip of coffee. Not because I must, but because I don’t want it to go to waste. Some farmer in a rainforest worked really hard to grow these beans and I respect that.
So…
(long, slow, pull on the java)
Ohhhh-h-h-hh-h-h-h god that’s so good!
Get away from me! Get your own damn coffee!
You people are crazy!