“Wadge” should be “wage.”

Okay – that was awesome.

I’m not going to do the review unless I get an outrageous fee…but I’ll tell you, if you make the title as intriguing as you did with this post-and-switch, you’ll get some attention on the ad. ;-)

Shipping Clerk

This is a three and a half (3.5) month contract position with a possibility of extension.

Shipping Clerk wanted for (_ _ _ _ _ ) company located in ( _ _ _ _ _).​ Successful candidate will have excellent communication skills, be well-organized and have a strong attention to detail.​ He or she must work well under pressure, be able to meet tight deadlines, work well both independently and as part of a team and be fluent in English, both spoken and written.​ He or she must also be highly proficient in MS Word and Excel.

The position reports to the Owner and is responsible for:

- Receiving Deliveries
– Verify ing receiving documents, including packing slips, purchase orders & invoices
– Post ing all necessary daily & weekly reports
– Shipping orders
– Data entry
– Other duties as assigned

MINIMUM REQUIREMENTS:
– Must pass background check
– Must pass credit check
– Must pass drug test (as well as three (3) other random tests)
– High School or equivalent required

Employment

- Monday through Friday: 10:00 AM to 4:00 PM
– Hourly wage $16.50
– Upon successful completion of contract (with 100% positive feedback) the employee may be eligible for a $5,000.00 bonus

That’s how I’d change it.

Two minor things-

I presume no benefits because it’s a short-term position?

Are there any physical requirements such as lifting X amount or being on your feet Y hours a day?

Edited

– Must pass drug test (as well as three (3) other random tests)

So what are these 3 other random tests? Driving test? Maths test? IQ test?

@Lightlyseared one drug test to get the job and 3 drug tests during the job

should it be
– Must pass drug test before employment(as well as three (3) other random drug tests during employment)

@coffeenut that would make it clearer.

Successful candidate will have
Looking for a candidate with…

Because of the size of the bonus (2 months pay?) my main question would be the qualifications for that.

100% positive feedback makes me believe you’re selling through ebay or amazon? You may want specify what is required there.

Also, it might be beneficial to break that into monthly bonuses unless it’s an unachievable carrot meant to get people to respond to the ad. A single negative feedback on my third day would basically disqualify me for the whole bonus, but $1500/mo, I could still knock out the remaining months. It may be more motivational once someone has the job, if that’s the goal.

@coffeenut I was afraid it was M-Cat, LSAT and Hare Psychopathy Checklist.

That was why I didn’t apply.

@funkdaddy I would explain further about the bonus in the interview
but basically 100% positive feedback means my feedback

1— ALL orders are shipped correctly (everything on the shipping label correct) so the customer receives the product.

2— ALL orders are packed correctly, so no product is damaged during delivery

The main motivation to do this job well is I’m paying $16.50 an hour that’s $4.50 higher than the average(as far as I can tell), just to fill out some forms and pack boxes. If a good job is done and done well I WILL pay out the $5000.00 bonus cash/check whatever
But this is a one time lump sum at the end of the contract.

Add should be Ad. And I’m looking for work, I would apply.

@coffeenut,

– Must pass drug test prior to employment as well as at three (3) other random times during employment

Even UPS has a 70-pound restriction on weights that must be lifted by an individual. 50 kg is over 110 lbs.

PS: It’s an ‘ad’, not an ‘add’.

Oh, yeah, and about that bonus:

Upon successful completion of contract (with 100% positive feedback) the employee may be eligible for a $5,000.00 bonus

“may be eligible” – only the possibility exists; you may be eligible and you may not

“eligible” – you qualify for it (you “may” qualify for it)—but even then you may not get it

Two heavy “maybe’s” for one hundred percent favorable feedback? Sounds like a very risky bet to me. Anyone who takes that is not going to be very smart, in my opinion. Is this a Catch-22?—if they agree, they’re disqualified?

I’m totally with @Jeruba. I think you need to be clearer on the requirements for the $5000 bonus. eligible already means you might qualify for the bonus but you still might not get and too say may be eligible adds another qualifier. It kind of sounds like your putting it out there to entice someone but will find a way to not give it to them.

Also, “contract employee”? That means they are responsible for their own Social Security, Medicaid taxes, etc.? That’s fine I guess, you just need to make that clear in the interview if that is the case. The $16.50 isn’t bad but someone better at math than me would have to do the calculations as to what the real hourly wage would be if your contract employee is responsible for paying his or her own Social Security and taxes.

I suppose the background check, credit check and an initial drug test are o.k., at least you’re being up front about it but you are going to require four (!!!!) drug tests over the course of a contract job with no benefits where their wage is going to be less than $16.50 if they have to pay their own SS and taxes for a job that is only going to last 3.5 months???? I don’t even think parolees and people on probation are required to take more than one drug test a month. It seems a little heavy handed. Really. I don’t even do drugs and that would keep me from applying for the job because it’s intrusive and a rather oppressive condition of employment, in my opinion.

“Pre-employment drug test + additional random tests during employment”.

The successful candidate must be able to work well under pressure, be able to meet tight deadlines, and be able to work well independently, as well as part of a team. Fluency in English, both spoken and written, is required.​ Candidate should be highly proficient in MS Word and Excel.

@Jeruba so should it be
Upon successful completion of contract (with 100% positive feedback) the employee would receive a $5,000.00 bonus ?

@lilycoyote

Normally to qualify for benefits you need to be with the company 3–6 months before you can apply, so because of this type of employment I’m not going to bother.

I think I’ll go with YARDLADY’s idea

Pre-employment drug test + additional random tests during employment

“Do you like to nitpick and overly correct others?”

No, I don’t.

You have had several people respond to your need for assistance with an ad. Yet, you insult them upfront.

If you are expecting 100-percent accuracy with a potential employee, then why are you not willing to use an online dictionary in order to represent yourself in an adequate light?

I would run from an ad displaying such demands, yet containing misspellings, poor usage of capitalization and other poor language skills. I couldn’t be certain of the quality of person I might be employed by.

Perhaps you might overlook ‘little’ mistakes with your employee so as not to nitpick or overly correct them.

Only with punctuation and the use of textspeak on a non-phone medium.

While I could nitpick it to death, there are two reasons I will not do so.

1) Others already have ad nauseaum.

2) Personally I prefer my potential employers to be human and to speak colloquially, However, I will overlook it if they have a smaller vocabulary than I do; most people do. If an ad is technically correct with proper grammar and all, it comes across as sounding like the company has a non-lubricated stick up it’s ass. By the same token, one written too casually will come across as unprofessional, and one with too many spelling errors comes across as both stupid and, in this day and age where spell-checkers are ubiquitous, lazy.

Your ad may not be perfect, but it tells me that your company is one that pays attention to detail while not being overly critical. About the only correction I would make (assuming this position is in the US) is changing the 50kg lifting requirement to 110 pounds. Most people will expect pounds and they don’t realize how heavy 50kg really is, so you may wind up with someone who is physically unqualified.

FWIW, the places I’ve worked are sticklers for safety to the point where a load like that requires two people. UPS had a 70 pound limit, and the parts I work with at a steel foundry that are that heavy are either two-man-lift or done with a chain hoist. The safety coordinator does not want the company to be held responsible for occupational injuries, and I think that that position is a workers compensation claim waiting to happen.

@coffeenut, “Pre-employment drug test + additional random tests during employment” is still open to @Lightlyseared‘s question way back up there: what are the other tests? The randomness is of time (i.e., when they occur) and not of what the tests are for. Your wording must be clear.

As for what you should say about the bonus, I don’t know because I don’t know what your intent is. If you mean that a person who completes the assignment with no negative feedback of any kind will get a bonus, say that. But this is an impossible criterion that not even a perfect being could fulfill. (Even perfect beings have enemies.) All it takes is one person saying “He forgot to refill the coffee pot,” right? You should be very clear about what it takes to qualify for this bonus. For example, “Bonus awarded for error-free completion of tasks.” With $5000 riding on it, it must not be vague or ambiguous—or loaded with loopholes so the person loses out over something debatable and feels cheated.

However, the details don’t have to go in the ad. The ad could just say “Eligibility for bonus.” A person who takes the job is eligible, right? and then must meet the qualifications? The point of the ad is to attract suitable candidates with an accurate description and not to constitute an entire contract.

@MissA I’m sorry if you find my question title offensive, after my other question with limited assistance mostly because of limited details and limited attention So this question I wanted different help, and changing two points
1— To attract attention success (Asking a direct question often gets limited results, you need to get creative sometimes)

2— To attract people who love to correct and scrutinize that will rip my ad apart semi-success

“If you are expecting 100-percent accuracy with a potential employee, then why are you not willing to use an online dictionary in order to represent yourself in an adequate light?”

Do you honestly believe this is the ad I’ll use “as is”? Are you high?

This is the fist “full” rough copy ad, the point of putting it on here (and other sites) is to find any big changes before the final tweak and since the post (22hrs ago) It is almost ready, so on Monday after a final review it should be good to go.

@Jeruba I would explain further about the bonus in the interview
but basically 100% positive feedback means my feedback

1— ALL orders are shipped correctly (everything on the shipping label correct) so the customer receives the product.

2— ALL orders are packed correctly, so no product is damaged during delivery

you get 2/2 you get the bonus…very easy

Only when they are nasty, aggressive or intolerant. In such cases two spelling mistakes per sentence have to be exposed.