It doesn’t sound like you were turning the other cheek at all, but rather being so passive-agressive when you were being screwed around with that you just bottled it all up to the point where your emotions have become toxic.
Vengeance is a lot like an alcoholic taking a shot of liquor. it’s a temporary and fleeting sense of relief that ultimately solves nothing and does nothing for the true deeper suffering going on. Say you get vengeance, then what? it won’t change what happened in the past, it won’t make you feel any less angry. You’ll feel empty, and hollow because what you were obsessed with before and now have gained has left you with nothing to show for it but more negative emotion. And now, you’ve wronged someone else and it’s likely that person is going to want to make you suffer in return, thus the cycle of suffering continues.
There is a lot of truth in Ghandi’s saying that ‘An eye for an eye makes the whole world blind’.
Forgiveness doesn’t mean you forget what happened to you, but rather that you accept that bad things happen with the good and there is no point in dwelling on the shortcomings of others. it’s not important for them to know or care about your forgiveness, it is more for you to self-affirm that you are taking a burden off your heart and will no longer let it hinder you.
That way all this energy that you have is not wasted on what can’t be changed, but rather on things you can change and do to make your life and those around you better and make new memories and connections that will allow you to move on from your past.