I have had almost no contact with my parents as an adult. At one point I went nine years without talking to them. They told me they don’t like me as a person and if I wasn’t their son, they would choose not to associate with me at all. The cause of this is my unwillingness to place family bonds above all else.
My parents resent the fact that I consider responsibilities I have willingly taken on myself to be more important than they are. For example, six months ago I gave my father my old computer, set it up for him, and gave him the basics on its use. I was supposed to come back the next day to teach him more advanced skills, like how to configure his router. He wasn’t feeling well the next day, so we put it off another day. The next day I was called upon to participate in a picket line to support two members of my union who have been screwed out of a month’s wages. My father was furious that I put the picket line ahead of him, and we have not talked since.
I can’t give him what he wants, which is to be the most important thing in my life.