Yes, it is a very personal journey, no one size fits all.
My separation/divorce is 10 years behind me as of Dec. 26. :-D
I think I went through most of my grieving while still in the marriage over the final 4 years.
The “denial & bargaining” phases were short lived, the usual, denial of the big issues, get some marriage counseling which had only the smallest band aide effect for a few months.
When I finally became aware that there was NO WAY I was ever going to be able to stay in the marriage the anger came. 20 something years of repressed rage and boy, it was not a pretty thing. I scared myself at the depths of my anger.
I was really, really, REALLY, ANGRY! lol
Angry that I had to make the decision, but knowing, with all my heart and soul I had to go!
By the time we finally separated I was just flat lined emotionally, but, after a few months the acceptance came, easier I think because I was the one that initiated the divorce.
Then, I went into the most amazing, liberating and enlightening phase of pure, unadulterated JOY!
I was “born again” in the truest sense of the word!
I went to work joyfully setting up my new little home, and relished, for the first time in my adult life, at age 43, just diggin’ myself, doing for myself, loving myself, celebrating my new life. Of course the big bang of it all has mellowed, but, I can still say with absolute certainty that it was the BEST thing I ever did and the joy was palpable for YEARS afterwards!
Time does heal all wounds, and it also wounds all heels. :-)