It helps that I am old and don’t have that many friends, but here are a few suggestions I suppose:
1. Not sure what type of phone you have. If it’s Android, you should be using Google Voice. Make sure it’s set to place all calls through it. Tell everyone your new phone number and demand that they use it. You now have more control. For example, you could set up call screening for everyone – or just certain groups of people. You could decide what you want to happen when certain people call you (which phones to ring, which voicemail, etc).
2. When you announce your new phone number, remind people that it’s 2013 and phone calls are for awful people. Be up front and let them know your rules and expectations.
3. Re: text messaging – you’re paying extra so people who don’t have smart phones or computers can send fake emails to you? Drop the service, save yourself some money, and ask people to email.
Be clear about your contact preferences. Generally, if someone places a phone call to you, they are stating that they don’t really care what you are doing right now. They are going to determine where your attention and energy is at this moment – them. If someone emails you, they are at least saying that they respect you enough to acknowledge that you have a life and would like to manage where and when you would like to be when you choose to address or respond to them.
Regarding that person who yelled at you (with ALL CAPS) – this is not a problem with messaging, phones, or technology. This is complete madness and smacks of control freak shit. I would completely remove any person from my life who sent me a message like that. I’m dead serious.
I’m a technology and smartphone junkie. But it’s only a tool. If you allow it be a tool for people to engage in co-dependent creepiness or abuse you by ignoring the fact that you are an individual agent who may psychologically desire the ability to maintain some control over your life, you’ll probably start to feel oppressed by the technology.
Just some thoughts from an old person…