When the topic of stay-at-home parenting is brought up I always hear how easy it is and how boring it must be. When you hear these comments all the time it’s hard to not think of them as put downs. I know. I’ve been a stay-at-home mom for 14 years. Think about what it would feel like if this was the common theme you heard about your choice of work. It starts to feel a bit degrading after a few years. Then you are asked what your plans are when the kids gets older. It’s as if taking care of your own family is not worthy. It lacks ambition.
I have two half-sisters who couldn’t understand why my mother, their step-mother, didn’t find work after her children left the house. My father was more than happy to have my mom home taking care of him and the house while he worked for pay, but that wasn’t good enough for my half-sisters. They thought my mom lacked ambition. My Mom had several hobbies she excelled at and she was always available for her family. She had ambition for her hobbies and family, not a paycheck. Think about how many people you know who have a job they love. I really don’t know that many. Why does paid work have to define who we are and where our ambitions lie?
My landlord told my husband that he was buddies with the owner of the local Subway and he said he could give him a call if I ever found myself bored and wanted to get out of the house. I know his intentions were good, but seriously? I do have a college degree and I’ve worked as both a corporate travel agent and leisure travel agent. I could find a decent job if that’s what I really wanted to do.
There was a time a few years back when I wasn’t feeling appreciated because I heard another stupid comment about stay-at-home parents. I asked a question here at Fluther about SAHM’s hoping for a little support. There were many SAHM’s who chimed in with some of the same complaints I had and it felt good to get a little support. There were of course others who didn’t have the nicest things to stay. One user told me I was being woe is me with my question. Another user mentioned how easy it is to be a stay-at-home parent (there’s that theme again). Then another mentioned how it is harder to take care of several pets than it is to take care of one child. So anyone here who says stay-at-home parents aren’t looked down upon need to find a stay-at-home parent and have a long talk with them.