Funny Coloma.

Moved mother into The Home today. Let’s just say I shall never again take directions from the residents who live on multiple identical floors.

@RealEyesRealizeRealLies Haha….when we moved to the country about 20 years ago my daughter joined the local 4-H group, it was called ” The Happy Sundowners”. lol
WTF! Sounded like a retirement home not a kids club.

Yesterday we went to a house and picked things up for auction. We rejected two, 2-shelf bookcases with glass doors because the plastic was starting to peel. The man said he would donate them and a stained rocker somewhere.

Today I was in the thrift store, about to leave, and I hear a woman going on about all the books she has bought there, and about her hunt for shelves. Then I hear her say something about wrapping the glass really well, so she could get it home safely. Finally, one of the workers says, “Yes, and you could even stack them if you wanted to!” BINGO! I walk back and there are the two shelves from the day before, and they got $6 each for them. I went and told the 2 girls working there and we all got a chuckle.

Best of luck with the rocker – it was $30!

@ibstubro Hah!
@hominid Oh man, I am so sorry, I have a friend that gets vertigo, it is awful! The chair aparatus is amusing though.

@Coloma Let me start off with I need to shorten my belt by adding another hole.

Carrying bags to car with arms wrapped around the bags and . . . The pants started to slip and slip but got to the car without incident but just.

^It’s the style in some age groups.

@Tropical_Willie Haha…I was mortified, I swear, I thought my undies were going to fall off in the parking lot! When I opened my car door, I backed up, did a quick scan of the area and then hiked my dress to pull my undies up. lol

I had a 3 final exams today. Halfway through one of the hardest tests I’ve ever taken someone let out an extremely loud and wet sounding fart.

I also had a question on an exam that went something along the lines of

“suppose you’re getting lucky with your lover and she fires darts from her vagina into your penis, what animal would you and your lover be?”

@El_Cadejo LOL
WTF! WHAT kind of test was this?
Some twisted Psychology class?

I have just started the day, so can yesterday’s humor count?

Disclaimer: this story is traumatically hilarious! remember the phrase “traumatically hilarious”

First let’s go over the setting: I am currently enjoying one of the longest day-off, as the day before yesterday was the independence day, and yesterday was international worker’s day, plus my usual day-off (I usually don’t have class on these days). So I will stay at home till next week.

Yesterday afternoon:
3:30 p.m: Ha, what a nice mid-day nap! Let’s do something useful for this day-off. First I’ll read my language book, then I’ll review some philosophy. After that I’ll do some exercises, I need to keep fit a little.
3:32 p.m: But first, let’s do some warm-ups. I’ll go to the web first, to freshen my mind… wait, a new book? About Mafia? Have to find a way to get a hand onto it, quick!
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5:00 p.m: Ah shit! I wasted my time today. Better leave those planned things to tomorrow. I still have plenty of time, right?

I don’t know if I should laugh or cry :(

I was running in broad daylight at a locale that is popular with runners and walkers and completely biffed it courtesy of an ragged edge of concrete poking through the dirt and gravel. As I got up to check myself, I noticed a pretty, young blonde about 20 yards behind me who, after I resumed running, totally smoked me with her pace.

And that’s how the universe tells you you are old.

@kevbo Hahaha! Classic irony!

At my lunch break, I was walking into the store with a sandwich in hand. I passed this dude who was walking out and also holding a sandwich. We were both like, “where did you get that?” and ended up trading halves like it’s the third grade lunchroom, and eating together on the bench outside.

Coloma, that’s not funny.

IT’S SEXY. :D

Well so on FaceBook I was posting about what I was reading in a book called Scarlet, which is a sequel to Gone with the Wind. In the part I was describing, it was a young man who breaks into houses, and looks at women while they are sleeping. Most of them wake up and get scared. So, this shit gets around about a mysterious prowler. Without giving out too many spoilers, Rhett Butler decides to do something about this prowler.

Then a good friend of mine just pops in and comments; ’‘I’m surprised Rhett gave a damn.’’

Well that’s only funny to anyone who knows the original book, and just the very last line of it at that but still…I laughed.

Otherwise, today pretty much sucked.

Nothing funny ever happens.

Something funny today: just discovered that this thread has a modded response :p

It’s early still, but I just fell up the stairs…fucking goofy slippers.

@Coloma Invertebrate Zoology.

@El_Cadejo That is so funny, what a great, humorous question!

It’s in the 50’s here, but I was determined to see if there were any mushrooms in the wood next to my house. Before I even crossed the fence, I thought “Screw this! It’s too cold and I don’t really care.” About that time, as I often joke about, a single mushroom ‘surrendered’ right at my feet. The only other I found was about the size of an almond, having lived it’s life, molded, and completely dried out.

But I didn’t get skunked this year!

I was looking out the window this morning into the woods and here came a cat I’ve never seen before. It walked right up to the patio, sat down, and started grooming itself generally like it lived here. Amused, I watched it from a distance as it generally lounged around the patio. Finally curious if it was friendly, I went and stood at the closed patio door. After a bit, it noticed me. Stared. Got up, sauntered in my direction, stopped and sniffed the BBQ grill in front of me, then, as soon as it thought it was out of sight, took off like a shot! Like I’d caught the neighbor kid having a dip in the pool.

Yeah, I had a slow day! lol

@ibstubro Awww…here kitty, kitty, kitty. You may have a new cat. :-)
Something chased a deer through my yard last night and left wads of deer hair in clumps all around the fence line, but no sign of a dead deer. It’s a mystery.

It was well fed, @Coloma. It was almost like there are lots of cats at home and he was here pretending to be lord and master. :) Dreaming of having his own pet humans.