Social Question

Dutchess_III's avatar

Is it normal to want to know how a person died?

Asked by Dutchess_III (46826points) December 15th, 2014
14 responses
“Great Question” (2points)

It appears that one of my former class mates has died. This announcement was made on Facebook. Several people have asked how it happened because he was relatively young. I want to know too, but since no one is getting any answers I assume they have their reasons for not telling.
I understand that if it was something like a suicide they wouldn’t want to broadcast that.

My question is, why do we want to know how and why?

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Answers

BeenThereSaidThat's avatar

I think when someone we knew growing up has died fairly young we are curious to know how and why. In our minds only old people die and we just assume it is old age reasons when they pass. when it hits close to our age it scares us more and we want to know why.

I would never ask though. I would assume the reason they are not saying is because they want it private. I knew a couple of people who died fairly young and the family would say “he/she put up a good fight but cancer won”. something like that anyway.

suicide or even a drug overdose could be the reason but I think you and your friends on facebook should just respect the privacy of the immediate family and wait to see if they divulge it later.

Dutchess_III's avatar

^^^ Right.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

I think @BeenThereSaidThat said it fairly well.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

@jca Believe me when I say I am NOT trying to be rude when I say this, but why do you always seem to feel the need to point it out if any topic has been discussed before on this site??
Lots of times there are different angles ,and opinions that don’t come out in the first or even second time round.
Just wondering?? Does it annoy you that much?

Dutchess_III's avatar

And I missed that Q.

jca's avatar

@SQUEEKY2: I didn’t do it because it annoys me. It doesn’t annoy me at all. I am showing others that this question was just asked very recently and that since the other question is similar, maybe, just maybe, some or all of the discussion may bel be relevant to this one.

I am not hesitant to ask a question that has been asked before especially if it’s a year or longer ago, because there are lots of new users here and maybe recent events may change people’s previous opinions on topics.

I am baffled that you think what I did above shows annoyance. Nothing I indicated in my post makes me seem annoyed at all. I put three words, “Recent, similar discussion.”

jca (36062points)“Great Answer” (4points)
zenvelo's avatar

To answer the question, we want to know, especially if it is an old classmate, because their passing makes us aware of our own mortality, and we wonder if we will check out in the same manner.

I had a college housemate who was always in great shape, ran, worked out, buffed. One day hiking on Catalina Island he dropped dead in his tracks. He was 45. It scared the bejeebers out of everyone because it was so unanticipated.

And when a fraternity brother died from a car accident at age 21, it was tragic, but people didn’t feel directly threatened. Curiosity about the cause of death is a quick check to see if the reaper might be walking up the sidewalk or not.

Earthbound_Misfit's avatar

I will admit I’m always curious. I think I’m just nosey. “Oh what the heck happened to them!?” I meant to say on the question @jca cited, Australian death notices/obits don’t usually include the cause of death. I just went and checked today’s Sydney Morning Herald to see if my memory was right and none of the obits I read had a cause of death. While I was in Canada I read print versions of newspapers and found the obituary section was quite prominent and included photographs and detailed obituaries and the cause of death. It was very interesting to me. I enjoyed reading detailed obituaries about the people’s lives. Perhaps I’m odd!

In addition, because I read digital news rather than print newspapers, I haven’t seen the obituary page for ages. I wonder how technology will affect death notices in the future.

LuckyGuy's avatar

i think there is an evolutionary component to our curiosity. The people who learned from the misfortunes of others were more likely to survive and pass their genes on to the next generation.
“Oog just died ” “How did Oog die?” “He ate a berry from that bush.” “Thanks. I will avoid that bush.”

The once who didn’t ask about Oog death ate the same berries and ended like him.

SQUEEKY2's avatar

I have to totally agree with @LuckyGuy we want to know how that person died,because if it was totally avoidable then we don’t want to repeat that same mistake.

LornaLove's avatar

I’m very curious and I say this because of the murder a few doors down from me some time last week. I am totally irritated that I simply ‘do not know what happened’. All we know is that there were 2 rapes and one murder. I am left wondering, why did he kill her? Why did he rape them, wheres is the other girl, who is the other girl? what happened? It’s so frustrating.

I have been reading translation pages from Romania where there is more information. (The victim was from Romania).

I wonder in which way it will help me to know? I think I want to know if he was deranged, if he just took too many drugs and lost it (easier to handle) or what ever.

OpryLeigh's avatar

Whenever I hear that someone has died I want to know how, especially if they were particularly young. I think it’s because when people die of anything other than an age related issue it makes you question your own and your loved ones mortality.

prairierose's avatar

Sure I think it is normal to want to know what happened when a person you knew dies. It is human curiosity to want to find out the cause of death. We are by nature curious creatures.

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