The first step I take is to become furious immediately. Then it is a right time to start looking for a person to blame. When a target is found, I recommend not to delay and launch the offensive as quick as possible because you can, heaven forbid, change your mind.
When an opponent is destroyed, you can relax for a while. Calm down a little because long hours of self-flagellation await you. Usually, during this break, I begin to analyze what has just happened. You can follow my example. For instance, I ask myself why the person has been so cruel to me or why my dialog partner has said it is only my fault and he has nothing to do with it. Here is a good time for a weep. But only a little one. Do not try much, if you can’t. It’s just for increasing the drama quality. Remember, you need strength for the next important steps to take. After leaving the battlefield, make sure the body of the guilty party is definitely dead or suffers in excruciating pain.
When you find yourself in a safe place where no one, especially this heartless offender you’ve attacked, can reach you, let think. Long. Much. Diligently. Remind every blow stricken. Do it properly. Nothing must be missed.
When you finish with it, proceed to the next topic: Why did it all happen? Begin your analysis with this guy’s behavior. Then go on to the current situation. After you have learned the whole biography of the offender in detail, studied deeply and thoroughly his or her personality, discovered all possible causes and effects of the event, you are ready to the most time-consuming and labour-intensive process – introspection. I do not know how much time it takes. Every case is unique. It depends on your stubbornness and the scope of the problem to be examined.
At the finish, you realize (maybe, not for the first time) your life is only your choices and no one is responsible for what happens in your own life, except you. You must work on the trouble you’ve got, not shift responsibility for it to anyone and wait for a solution to fall from the sky.
The last but not least step is not to forget to apologize to the person you’ve hurt if you still have a chance.
Congratulations! Having followed the above-mentioned instructions, you will probably fix the situation. And things will go your way again.
Afterword: be self-ironical. This prevents from repeating mistakes.