Yeah. I think it’s both.
I’m talking to a girl currently, who is probably out of my class. She’s beautiful and has a kind of rich family. I waited a LONG time to ask her out. When she said yes, I had to do a mental pull back to stop from being too excited. I’ve been trying to find that delicate ’ balance ’ between trying to seem interested, but not infatuated. It’s just plain difficult. We haven’t gotten to the point where I can just say what’s on my mind. We may never…. Hopefully she starts to like me more and we fall in love and live happily ever after. But that’s not always the case. In fact, dating usually has more failure than success. But with each date I become more familiar with interacting with females, and increasing my own confidence.
Dating can be a numbers game. I know a guy that tries to have sex with every girl he’s ever met. Mostly he’s thought of as a creep. But he understands that it’s a probability thing.If he asks enough girls, eventually, one says yes. He had sex with a girl who called the wrong number once.
Each person needs their own style.
Keep hope alive.
Get out there, and stop trying so hard :)