Practice with a stuffed toy. You could video yourself so you can decide what looks natural and what comes off as stupid.
Touching a wrist can be endearing, if the person doesn’t have their hands in their lap.
Touching upper arm tends to come off as intrusive, unless there is a close bond already.
I had the same hurdle with small talk as a youth. I tended to be like my native ancestors, and spoke when I had something to convey. I struggled with the use of small talk to begin a conversation. Mentioning the weather seemed stupid, since I grew up around farmers. We tended to know the weather by looking outside, and a sniff or two could predict the likelihood of rain.