I didn’t think anything could be harder than 2013 when I watched my mother suffer for 10 months until her death after her ruptured brain aneurysm, but this year has been more difficult in different ways.
When you deal with a sick parent most people can relate and it’s easy for friends to show support, but when you deal with issues related to parenting, especially issues most parents never have to deal with, you find out who really has your back. People understood my heartache where my mother was concerned, but they didn’t understand my difficulties in my home life for the past 1½ years. Most people didn’t know how our family was struggling because I didn’t say anything for a long time. People could tell something was wrong but some didn’t reach out. Instead they gave up on me. I lost what I thought were good friends and it took me some time to realize I wasn’t important to them. It still hurt. I also lost friends once I shared what was going on with my family.
This year has been one of the shittiest and most difficult for me, but I’ve learned so much. I value the few strong friendships I have. My bonds with my father and siblings is stronger. I also have a new family in the transgender community. I’m happy with my tribe and I look forward to a new, amazing year that is full of promise.