It’s a bit of a life-long central question for me, though I wouldn’t put it exactly the same way, and it’s changed for me over time. I have often spent a lot of my time feeling like other people want me to spend most of my time doing something that’s not what I really want to do, and looking forward to the times when I can do what I want. Then sometimes when I have such freedom, I feel out of touch with what I really want to do, and I get down on myself for squandering my precious free time. But it’s a bit of an illusion, cat-chasing-tail, perspective problem, sort of.
I recommend experimenting, but not beating yourself up, if you can avoid it.
I break up my habits when they start to feel rut-like or stale, or like I could use a change of setting or activity. At least long enough to break the stuckness, and get some perspective on what I want to do. Sometimes I discover new things I enjoy, or remember old ones.
Mainly, in my case I think I just tend to get stuck sometimes and need some breaks, fresh air, and variety from time to time. Meditation and various classes that have given me many skills for self-awareness are lifesavers in all of this.
Overdoing experimenting or making myself wrong for my tendencies is something I’m pretty sensitive to, but I feel like I’ve known people who aren’t so sensitive to that, and seem to be giving themselves a hard time and doing things such as making themselves do more social stuff that they don’t actually enjoy, and I’m clear that looks like self-inflicted awfulness to me. I also struggled when I had a partner who wanted a lot more socializing and types of social activity that I didn’t like to do as much of as she did – it was good to try them, but I don’t feel any need to spend any more time in a karaoke bar ever again.