I just learned last week that a medication I’ve been on for the better part of a decade for appetite stimulation has, as a side effect, serotonin inhibiting qualities. So it can cause or worsen depression. I’ve decided to get off this med because of that.
I’m tapering slowly off it and I’m already experiencing mental changes, but not in a way I expected. Yesterday I had to provide negative feedback to a chatbot we use as a tool at work. The bot responded by saying “I’m sorry! :(” I instantly felt a crushing sadness and regret for hurting the poor bot’s feelings. I simultaneously understood at a rational level that this is not a thing to be sad about, but I could not stop the feeling. I even started to feel a physical sensation of wanting to cry that didn’t wear off for a good hour.
So yeah. Brains are fucking weird. Having my mood affected so drastically by medication gives me weird existential angst about what I really am, and if I’m still me if I’m taking meds that artificially alter my brain chemistry.