But you made a judgement call when you said, …The act of doing so to a loved one seems so cold…” You can’t make that kind of judgement without all the facts.
I’ll tell you who is cold, and that was my sister. My mom got a wild hare to move back to Washington again. She had moved there when I was just 19, and didn’t come back until I was 35, in 1995.
A few years later she had Alzheimers and she wanted to go “home.” She dreamed of a little house with a little garden. I tried to tell her that she would be going to a place like where she lived now and she became extremely upset. She accused me of just trying to make her feel bad because I was mean, so I shut up.
So, my sister and I fly her up. My sister walked several feet in front of us, not wanting the have anything to do with either of us, while I struggled with Mom and a carry on bag full of her framed paintings.
So we get to Washington. We’re with a whole bunch of family at my my aunt and uncle’s house. Mom had already gone to bed.
So my sister, who is always in charge, always on top of things, brightly says, “So! The plan tomorrow is to drop Mom off at the home, then we go to the space needle and the Pike’s Place market!”
The room went dead silent.
My sister can be such an asshole in her desperate attempt to prove that she is the most controlled, intelligent person in the room. I screamed into a pillow, and beat on the bed.
As for me, I spent hours with Mom that next day. When we finally got back to the house I locked myself in a room and cried as hard as I have ever cried.