My first was also at school, in the first grade. We were learning how to change words by removing either the beginning or the end of a word and substituting to make a different word. Teach was working through bit, fit, hit….. I jumped ahead and wrote shit on a scrap of paper and showed it to the boy next to me. Unfortunately, he wasn’t much of a reader. He stared at it too long and I was caught showing it to him. When the teacher saw it, I was so scared I nearly tossed lunch. She explained that although she appreciated my attempt at showing initiative, she couldn’t overlook knowing that I was aware I had written a naughty word, and that is nothing to be proud of. I felt crappy, but I was so pleased with myself for getting it right, crappy feelings disappeared.

I told my mom she was being a bitch, at 14 years old, and got backhanded in the mouth while she was driving.

When my son was 2½ years old he dropped the bowl he was eating out of, and promptly said, “oh shit”.

I remember many things about my early life, but this is not one of them.

Except, some time after I would’ve learned some swear words, one of my friends used the N word, without explaining the racist aspect, and I repeated it in front of my dad, who corrected me more severely than he ever did about anything before or since.

First day of kindergarten…or rather on the way to my first day of kindergarten.

Song came on the radio with the F word in the lyrics. I didn’t know what it meant, but thought it sounded catchy.

Came home chanting the F word. Got my mouth washed out with soap by my older sister. Which is kind of weird. I remember wondering why that was even happening.