General Question

irocktheworld's avatar

What should I do with the rude,cool kids?

Asked by irocktheworld (2119points) August 27th, 2009
44 responses
“Great Question” (2points)

I just started school yesterday and on the way home I was having a fun and good 1st day,but had problems with the locker (whatever) and then on the bus these two mean girls were messing with my head and saying retarded,wild,and innapropriate crap to me and I just really couldn’t take it.I’m afraid that in the next year older people like them will just keep messing and making fun of me all because of no reason!I came back home practically crying and freaking out!I didn’t want to go to school and it was nothing like I expected it to be and I was confident and happy until they ruined it.I’ve tried talking to all my friends and my sister and they all said I should ignore them and act like they’re not there or tell them to stop and fight with words.
Is that right?
Should I do it?
Today they didn’t talk to me but they looked at me,I don’t know if that means anything or not but I don’t know…everyone says they’re the royal skaters and populars but I try not to let that get to me and when they spoke to me like that,I lost my confidence right away.But today was a better day though.:)

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Answers

MrGV's avatar

Beat their asses

teh_kvlt_liberal's avatar

Ignore them
Flip them the bird when you see them

Sarcasm's avatar

PUNCH HIM IN THE NUTS! wait, hold on, let me actually read your post

I hate to sound rude, but I think you need to grow up a bit. The world is full of rude people. You need to learn to handle some insults.
If there aren’t assigned bus seats, move elsewhere on the bus.

brettvdb's avatar

Honestly, ignore them. Just pretend they don’t exist, and when they make fun of you or try to look at you, just look right through them, as if they aren’t even there. If you respond to them by saying nasty things back, or “flip them the bird” like @teh_kvlt_liberal, you give them reason to continue making fun of you.

They are trying to get a reaction from you, so ignoring them will probably cause them to get bored and leave you alone.

I was given this advice a few times when I was younger, so I know it’s easier to say than to actually do, but consider it a work in progress and just do your best.

ABoyNamedBoobs03's avatar

welcome to highschool, that stuff’s going to happen, does to almost everyone at some point, especially freshmen, you just kind of have to roll with it unless it’s becoming a constant issue.

irocktheworld's avatar

@MrGeneVan LOL4RL! I wish! My sister said that too,haha! But they are older than me,that’s the problem.
@teh_kvlt_liberal All right thanks,I’m trying my best on that :) Haha okay!
@Sarcasm Lol! Yeah…your right,I have to grow up a little because reading your post actually made me think of everything and I know that I will have to deal with all this.Gatcha!

teh_kvlt_liberal's avatar

I mean behind their backs
Feels good man

brettvdb's avatar

Haha i definitely won’t argue with that!

Another option might be to just one day ask them flat out why they are being so mean to you. If you catch them off guard they probably won’t have an answer for you.

I would still recommend just ignoring them though as the above might backfire.

cyndyh's avatar

Have you heard people say “Don’t sweat the small stuff”? Well, you’ll soon find out that they’re small stuff. Think of how sad it must be to be them. If they really have nothing better to do than to hassle people you should feel sorry for them.

ABoyNamedBoobs03's avatar

honestly though, once you realize how absurd highschool drama is, it all just starts to be pretty comical. Don’t let it get to you because it really doesn’t mean anything other than you’ve got a couple d-bags in your school, like everyone else does.

brettvdb's avatar

One time in highschool some friends and I put a dead octopus into a vacant locker that was close to the locker of a huge ahole, threw on a padlock, and left it.

Boy did he get it…unfortunately so did everyone else who had a locker in that hall.

irocktheworld's avatar

@brettvdb All right! Will do! I’m trying my hardest,honestly.It’s a whole different world here and I’m just gonna have to get used to it.There will always be haters and I just realized that.
@ABoyNamedBoobs03 Your soo true…I’ll deal with it and that’s life.Yeah,I wont let it get to me and thanks soo much boobs! :) Yep,pretty dramatic! :(
@teh_kvlt_liberal Lol I bet it does! :)
@brettvdb I was about to do that but I was scared..=/ But I’ll ignore them along the way and thanks so much.
@cyndyh Your right! I realized that they only make fun of me because they want to feel more powerful and better about themselves! I do.=]

cyndyh's avatar

@irocktheworld : Here’s hoping you’ll have a better day tomorrow. School can be fun. Don’t let the dumbasses ruin it for you.

Resonantscythe's avatar

I have to ask why you care. They’re just some random idiots who happen to take the same bus as you. Just like the immature simpletons they are, ignore them and it will take the fun away for them. people like that only have as much power as you give them.

Darwin's avatar

Those girls may be older than you in years, but look at how young they are acting. They must think they are still in middle school. Unless they change a huge amount before graduation they are slated to be among life’s losers.

One positive step to take is pay attention to who is nice to you, and be nice in return. You will build up friendships, and once you have friends, the “mean girls” won’t come near you because they only prey on people they think are alone.

You might consider joining a club, or just make a couple of friends among the others that ride the same bus as you. Then you can freely ignore the “mean girls.”

If you want more insight into how all this works, you might go to the library and check out a copy of Queen Bees and Wannabes by Rosalind Wiseman. It is the non-fiction book that was the basis of the Lindsay Lohan movie Mean Girls. My daughter and I both read it and discovered a lot of useful information on how high school social life functions.

As you make friends at school every day will get better (although 1st period Biology will still suck).

Ansible1's avatar

High school is supposed to prepare you for the real world. However you choose to deal with this situation, you will gain experience to help you deal with the real world

Bri_L's avatar

I think the best thing in the world you can do, and the most hurtful thing to them, is ignore them and be bored with everything they do and say.

They are popular not just because they are but because everyone gives them that status.

Don’t you buy into it.

In fact, don’t even give them enough thought to be board with them. And if they get in your face on the bus even after you move ask “If I’m that bad why do you need to be by me so bad?”

avvooooooo's avatar

They are looking for a reaction. Don’t give them one. Act bored with their bitchiness. If they keep on ever if you’re ignoring them, just coolly look at them and say “Its kind of sad how you’re as old as you are, but so immature.” Odds are they won’t know what to say to that.

trailsillustrated's avatar

ignore em. they’ll give it up.

bumwithablackberry's avatar

Read Science of Survival, you can get it online for about 10 bucks. And Tao of Jeet Kune Do, that could be helpful. Spring Snow by Yukio Mishima. And maybe watch Powder. Otherwise, I got bullied, and I bullied, so I’m a jerk, no I don’t really have any advice. I do, but I don’t feel right giving it.

ubersiren's avatar

I know it’s hard to ignore them, but that does seem to be the best medicine. Don’t look at them, don’t react to their words, or even their presence.

I was bullied horribly in middle school, and I wish I’d have had the willpower to just ignore it. I exacerbated the problem by letting them see how upset I was. I was often caught in the bathroom crying, or begging the faculty for help when they got physical. I should’ve just not let it get to me. Because now, at 28 years old, I look at all my bullies and they’re all fat potheads who still live in my hometown in their mothers’ basements.

Just know that you are, and always will be better than they are, and they’re not worth your time. They’re not worth the desks they sit in. C’mon, you’re name is irocktheworld! Stick your chin out and look right past those bitches!

Strauss's avatar

@irocktheworld ditto to what @ubersiren just said. You chose irocktheworld for your name, and I believe you can and do! It’s not all going to be a bed or roses, but love yourself for what you are and can do.They are no better than you, no matter what anyone else thinks. Kick ass and take named! (figuratively, of course!)

bumwithablackberry's avatar

It’s inevitable, and it won’t last forever if you learn from it. There are always going to be external forces working against you, wait, that sounds wierd. There are always going to be assholes out, wait you over 18? The world is full of creeps missing pieces, they try and get those missing pieces from others, right now it’s you. Fight or flight, get good at both. Don’t sweat it unless someone has a weapon on you or you’re grossly out numbered and you slept with his mom. Chill, learn from it. I mean, maybe you’re a geek, are you a geek, that’s cool, I was part geek, still am. Now meditate, imagine a white bubble of boundless love, warmth, and protection around you, don’t let anyone burst your bubble. And if all that doesn’t help, I got a friend who was in special forces but got kicked out for being, too crazy, occasionally he scares people for me… Kidding kidding

PerryDolia's avatar

One of the characteristics of a child is they feel they have little power in the world, so they do things just to get a reaction from somebody. Making the other person react is the way they feel a bit of power.

It isn’t so much ignoring them as it is understanding their childishness. When you see it for what it is, a lame attempt to elicit a response from you, it is easier to put their silly words in perspective.

You are the one who is responsible for how you feel about things. They cannot bother you unless you let them.

Deny them the reaction. Look out the window as if they were two chattering monkeys and you can’t understand what they are saying, and they will find someone else to harass.

MissAusten's avatar

I’m going to second @Darwin‘s suggestion about the book Queen Bees and Wannabees. It is an excellent book with very helpful strategies for dealing with the kind of thing you experienced.

In the meantime, you can either ignore them and refuse to give them the satisfaction of seeing you react, you can confront them in a matter-of-fact way and say you don’t like what they are saying, or you can talk to a teacher or counselor at school that you trust.

I know it doesn’t seem like it now, but those high school years fly right by. I remember when I was a freshman, it felt like I had so long to go before graduation. Next thing I knew, I was in college. Not due a long blackout from drugs or drinking, either.

Supacase's avatar

Read a book, listen to music or stare out the window and pretend they don’t exist. If they get worse by doing stupid things like smacking your book, just give them with a “wow, you’re being really immature” look and go back to what you were doing.

Ignoring them is best, but I can tell you from personal experience that it doesn’t always work. I was bullied by a girl in 8th & 10th grade (not sure why she left me a lone in 9th) and I finally did that one thing people say to do but is so scary. I stood up to her. I still remember it like slow motion. I put my books in my locker, took a deep breath and said, “Fine. You want to kick my ass so bad? Come do it.” I thought my best friend was going to DIE by the look on her face. Or maybe she thought I was going to die. LOL The girl sputtered about and ended up looking like a complete idiot in front of her posse. I really only recommend this as a last resort, though. Then again, “Mean Girls” don’t like to fight. They might break a nail.

teh_kvlt_liberal's avatar

And anyone who is rude is definitely is not cool
Remember, manners first!

Tink's avatar

I agree with @brettvdb, by asking them why are they acting like total bitches.
I would say as I’ve said it before, just ignore them, they don’t have anything better to do than mess with kids. Definetly give ‘em the finger behind their backs. Just don’t get in a fight with them on the first week of school, not cool.
And they probably aren’t even cool, they might just be “pretty” but that doesn’t make them cool anyways.
This reminds me of Middle School, ugh! The horror!

irocktheworld's avatar

@brettvdb OMG why did you do that!? LOL!
@cyndyh Thanks! I think tomarrow will be a great day also! Yeah..I won’t let them screw my year up for me! Thanks! =]
@Resonantscythe Well i care because it’s my first year and I’m worried and everything is soo different and they are making things harder for me.They’ll come and go sooner or later.:)
@Darwin Yeah! I know,they are soo immature! :O I hate how they are soo mean and act like this to everyone! Yeah..I’ll get that book,thanks! =] They’re really annoying and loud so I’ll keep my distance and watch out but stay strong.:)
@Ansible1 Thanks! That’s so true!
@Bri_L Thanks! Yeah…so true! They make themselves feel better while everyone is feeling worse and the best thing I can do is ignore them like I will but honestly,it’s hard to but I’ll do it! =)
@avvooooooo Haha sweetness! I’ll tell them that as soon as they keep on being bitchy! I’d love to see their reaction but tat’s all they wanted from me,to see what I’d do. :O
@trailsillustrated Will do! :)
@ubersiren Haha,you really made me smile! Thank you soo much! Omg,yeah,I think I’m going through that too because I honestly wanted to crawl under a freaking rock and cry my eyes out just because of 3 people and I really hope they will stop.Ignoring is what I will deffinitely do! :) LOL fat potheads..:P Yep! I was bullied in 3rd grade and turns out that the girl who bullied me turned really chubby at a younge age and doesnt have many friends.:D I’ll keep everyone updated! :)
@Yetanotheruser Aww…thanks soo much! XD I’m practically smiling right now..next time I will just ignore them and just tell them to leave alone and bug off since they gatta find something better to do and next time,I’ll take charge! :P Yeahh! I’ll deffinitely kick ass! :)
@bumwithablackberry Yeah,I know..nope! I’m under 18.Yeah..theres alot of ass holes in the world and they probally are still assholes as an adult too!Thanks alot!:D Umm..i really don’t know what I am but I know I am not a loser,I don’t think..but I am not popular like them.=/ LOL! :)
@PerryDolia Yep! :) All they care about is seeing my reaction and laughing their asses off! :/ Hehee…yeahh! I’ll do that! They are really retards to me and I show no respect for them and I really don’t wanna cause a scene and just be chill.I’m honestly not used to being made fun of,I usually get made fun of for my nose but whatever! Everyone can be insecure at times,right? Well..I’ll deffinitely think they are monkeying around.Thanks! :)
@MissAusten Thank you Miss Austen! Yeah…I’ll get that book and read it first thing! I WILL ignore those shit heads and act like they’re not there! They are really insecure! Everyone says the years will pass by but next year they will be gone and I’ll be soooo happy and relieved I won’t have to deal with drama..(hopefully)
@Supacase Great idea! Omg,that’s great! I’ll bring an mp3 player or something like that and just chill out while they’re busy doing whatever.I’ll deffinitely mention that! =] Ohh wow…your really brave,your like a role model of mine! Your awesome! That’s great! I wish I were there.:) Ignoreing is best! :)
@teh_kvlt_liberal You got that right! Be nice! Haha yepp! ;)
@Tink1113 I’ll do that! God,thinking about them makes me soo pissed off! Yeahh! haha,will do,fuck them! Haha I feel soo mean.:P No fighting,got it! Tomarrow is Friday so I’m good! :) I don’t think they are cool,well i thought so but now I saw an ugly side of them which was WAY wrong from what I thought! :O That sucks…I was surprised when you said you got made fun of…what’s there to make fun of? Seriously.Yeah it sucks!!!!
Thanks soo much you guys! I love you all and will keep you posted!!
YOU GUYS FREAKING ROCK! XD

YARNLADY's avatar

It sounds like you have been introduced to the secret Super Power that every one has, but few know about, the Power of Ignore.

It works like this, do not Hear, do not Acknowledge, do not pay Heed to anything you don’t like. That is called the “HAH” method

bennihan's avatar

Why do you feel the need to acknowledge them at all? Be yourself and get some confidence. Or in guy talk I’d like to call that some swagggggger. Maybe start bathing in old spice.

But for real you don’t need them. If you stop worrying about what other people think and live your life to the best way you know how I think you’d be a lot happier.

Being in grade school sucks! Just wait until yo go to college. You’ll love it. That is if the world doesn’t end in 2012

Supacase's avatar

BTW, rude in no way equals cool. They may be popular, but that is probably because people are scared of being on the receiving end of their crap. They will never know how many people are actually their friends or are just pretending to be. Kind of sad.

Also, this cockiness of theirs won’t last. Life after school will give them a swift reality check. If that makes you feel any better.

hungryhungryhortence's avatar

This is dirty pool but the world is a sometimes dirty place:

Ignore these girls but not in the avoiding way, just verbally and with minimal eye contact. Let them feel your tension but take the fear out of it. When you see them, put it in your head they are amusing themselves with the easiest means possible, let your contempt radiate instead of fear or hurt and they will sense this, maybe back off a bit but probably not.

Look at what guys they are spending time looking at and make it a point to smile or nod to those guys but don’t bother yourself with actually talking to them or giving them enough eye contact to think over the top flirting because young guys can also be cruel and make fun of girls for the simple act of showing interest. Still- it’ll bother those girls if the guys they pay attention to get some attention from you.

Do you any remote interest in making friends with some of the smartest girls or guys in your school? What about some scarier than shite looking ones? Go build a social posse!

derekpaperscissors's avatar

Bask in the glory of being unique. Do what you want, do good, fudge what other people think, and have fun.
Stick to your interests, develop them and your talents. When the time comes, you’d have more going for you, and you’d probably have met your kind of people. The “rude, cool kids” won’t even matter to you.
Besides, have you ever considered, these kids probably have the same issues of insecurity, teen angst, and identity crisis that made them end up in that group. Maybe that helps. You in turn, shouldn’t be or end up like that, hiding behind friends, bullying, jokes, and what’s in or trendy or cool now. Develop yourself and those people around you. Embrace their criticism, make it a positive for you, as crazy as that sounds. Don’t feed them with you getting affected negatively by it. They’ll soon tire once they realize its actually pushing you to be better.

irocktheworld's avatar

@YARNLADY Haha,yeah I have and it’ all because of you guys.:)
@bennihan Thanks,now I really do have confidence in myself and the next time they talk,sure I’ll ignore but I’ll also stand up for myself because I’m not gonna let anyone talk like that to me.
@Supacase Yeah,I thought they were cool but since they showed their true colors then no. Right,right…yes!!! I don’t even thing half of their friends are really their friends!They are probally their friends so they won’t get made fun of o because of their looks.:/ Ys it does.:)
@hungryhungryhortence Thank you hungryhungryhortance! :D Ok,I’ll make sure to do that.Haha yeah,I think some of the guys on my bus are cute but I don’t want to flirt with them since you never know if they play games and stuff,you know?Good point,but what if they see me talking to a guy and they run up to the guy and say crap about me or the thing they said with me from the start?Well I have a group of friends in the back of the bus and in school which are really nice and that I’ve known for at least a year or more.But they’re really nice too.Will Do! :)
@derekpaperscissors I did,until they came along but now I know that it’s jus not worth it.OK! Yeah..I think I will.:) I think so too,they are probally really insucure and want someone to pick on…I will.Thanks derek! Omg,your so right! It really did prepare me for then next time it might happen.=]

sdeutsch's avatar

@Supacase took the words right out of my mouth – having something to focus on other than them will make it much easier to ignore them. I got teased a lot in middle school, and I just made sure that I always had a book with me. That way, I could focus on the book and tune out their childishness – and once they figure out that they’re not going to get a rise out of you, no matter what they do, they’ll give up and move on to someone else. My advice would be to go with an mp3 player and a book – that way both your ears and eyes are occupied, and it’ll be much harder for them to get through to you.

Good luck – it’s never easy, but I know you’ll get through it. And remember – WE all know you’re better than them, and so do your friends at school – who cares what the bullies think?

irocktheworld's avatar

@sdeutsch Thank you! Yeah…i got teased but I just kept my head straight up and ignored them. Maybe a little eye rolling but at least I ignored them.:) I’ll try to remember that! :) I absolutly hate people that make fun of us..it sucks.
Thanks! Yeah,life is challenging but you’ll get through it.:) Aww…thanks,yeah I know that too.=] I dont! No one does.:)

bumwithablackberry's avatar

Hey everyone kind of assumes that @irocktheworld is a good guy. Maybe he’s mean maybe he deserves it. I thought I gave some heartfelt advice then I thought, I could be doing the devil’s work, guess I am anyway, in the form of advocacy.

Darwin's avatar

I thought @irocktheworld was a girl?

irocktheworld's avatar

Im a girl.Doesn’t my profile sound girly? :O
@bumwithablackberry I’m mean? (gets sad and frowns)

bumwithablackberry's avatar

Sorry, but you could be mean, I don’t know. But, that sucks these people are picking on you. Bummer, your in highschool right? You’ll be ok. I’m sure that getting picked on is just a small part of your life, don’t let it linger as much as possible. Just say Grrrr

irocktheworld's avatar

Its fine :) But I’ve only seen these girls riding their bikes around here and when I saw them,it looked like I was their target and I was.I didn’t do anything at all to them.I swear to god.Your right…i won’t let it get to me much.:) Lol! Ok.grrr…:D Wow I feel a lot better.:P

Disc2021's avatar

Either attack them with a beating stick or report them to someone – you’re being harassed and it’s not okay.

bumwithablackberry's avatar

“I’m gonna learn Jiu-Jit-Tsu?” Neo, The Matrix

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