Social Question

Neizvestnaya's avatar

Okay Jellies, you or your experiences- do people really want to dance at weddings?

Asked by Neizvestnaya (22667points) July 6th, 2011

I’ve got a co worker to be my “opening act” wedding singer and another co worker who’s a karaoke host trying to talk me into have a dance floor and letting people have music and to be able to sing. Have you seen it, have you done it, was it fun, was it awkward? Ours will be a small group under 40 people.

Bonus lurve if you can suggest romantic songs a female would sing for a male. No one’s ever heard me sing but I just might

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30 Answers

WestRiverrat's avatar

It depends on the wedding party, I have seen them be hits and I have seen them flop. My dad was a preacher for 50+ years, I have seen some strange stuff.

Do you have any venues picked out for the reception yet? If there is room and someone wants to DJ for you I see no reason not to do it. If they are expecting to get paid for it I would not change the plans just for them.

augustlan's avatar

It depends on the wedding crowd. If they’re young (or young at heart), fun-loving kind of people, yes. My first wedding reception was a blast, with lots of dancing. Everyone said they had a fabulous time. I was only 19 at the time, and we had a good mix of older and younger people and everyone danced. There were fewer than 50 people there. With a more sedate crowd, I’d say no.

Bellatrix's avatar

Our wedding dance was a farce. After six months of lessons, the room we had to dance in at the wedding was about a quarter of the size of the room we practised in. The guests thought it was very amusing though and everyone had a fun time.

You should do what you want to do at your wedding. It is after all YOUR wedding. If you want to dance and to have dancing, dance. If you don’t don’t.

lucillelucillelucille's avatar

Every wedding I have ever been to had dancing.Karaoke might be fun too.:)
You could sing this or….
this
;)

WestRiverrat's avatar

There is no reason people can’t dance to the karaoke machine.

athenasgriffin's avatar

Dancing is fun in any occasion. However, I agree with @augustlan. Take the type of people you are around as an indicator of how you should plan your wedding.

jca's avatar

I have a feeling that older people (like 50’s and beyond) would just enjoy regular dancing and not karaoke. Karaoke might be good for the after party, when the young drunk ones go someplace else and get really stupid.

redfeather's avatar

The last wedding I went to… Everyone got down. Everyone. It was awesome.

Jude's avatar

I like the dancing. Not too big on karaoke at a wedding, though. ‘Islands in the stream..”

I’d keep it to dancing and plenty of the “white man overbite”.

Kardamom's avatar

Dancing and karaoke are both fun things until someone tries to force, cajole or influence someone who doesn’t want to do it get up there. I do not like to be the center of attention and I get embarrassed easily when someone comes over to me, or points a real spot light on me and tells me that it will be fun. But I enjoy watching other people sing.

I enjoy dancing, but some of my family members and friends, are very embarrassed when it comes to dancing (either they don’t know how, or have been put into humiliating situations before, and they prefer just to watch).

I think it’s fine to have karaoke, but just let everyone volunteer and don’t try to force people (no matter how friendly the forcing seems) into getting up there. I had a very humiliating experience in school, with wanting to join the choir, but my teacher made me get up in front of everyone, with no music and sing a solo. I froze up and couldn’t do it, even though I was a pretty good singer. From that day forth, I was known as “not a good singer.” It was very embarrassing and I felt crushed, because I was never allowed to be in choir because of that incident. Suffice to say, I don’t ever want anyody to come up to me to tell me how much fun it will be if I just give it a try. I’d rather go to the dentist and get a filling.

So having dancing and karaoke are fine, but please do not have a person or group of people who’s job it is to drag people up to participate. Shy people dread that kind of thing.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

I mainly want the karaoke so it can back my “wedding singer” as he opens our ceremony with Nick Cave’s “Red Right Hand”. If I have that then I might as well leave it for anyone to goof with and if they don’t use it then I’m hoping the machine will just play music.

I’ve never done karaoke.

WestRiverrat's avatar

@Neizvestnaya most of the karaoke machines can play regular soundtracks too. And sometimes it is better for dancing if the songs are just insturmentals anyway, Especially at a wedding reception. You can turn the volume down enough so that people that don’t want to dance can still hear their neighbor talking to them across the table.

Cruiser's avatar

If the guests are close and well liquored up the Karaoke can be a blast. Make sure to have a Cher wig and bright red lipstick on hand for the guys! Have a blast!

Simone_De_Beauvoir's avatar

Depends on your friends, really. A wedding doesn’t necessarily need dancing, in my opinion.

Kardamom's avatar

Oh I forgot. From This Moment by Shania Twain is my most favorite romantic song sung by a female.

I also like Wind Beneath my Wings by Bette MIdler

And You Raise Me Up as sung by Celtic Woman

jca's avatar

As far as myself dancing, I feel I dance best when I have a few drinks and the dance floor is dark, and the music is loud. At weddings, the drinks are soaked up by the food, the dance floor is usually lit brightly and the music is not that loud, and keeps stopping for the stupid wedding songs, and the bride and groom stuff (which, let’s face it, is what the wedding is for, except for me it does not make a good dance atmosphere).

linguaphile's avatar

I’ve found that dancing is much more comfortable in a smaller room (not too small) because the dancers seem to feel ‘lost’ when the dance floor’s too big. Maybe they feel too exposed or they’re not close enough to others to get that exchange of energy. I’ve planned 6 proms/dances and chaperoned maybe 10 more- and every time the dance floor’s smallish for the crowd, the teens really do dance and have fun, and if the dance floor’s too large, they stay on the perimeter or huddle into pods. Teens, wedding guests—same or different? You decide :)

GladysMensch's avatar

@Niezvestnaya Nick Cave, although a deity incarnate, isn’t exactly known for dance hits. If your crowd is into his stuff, then I’m willing to bet that they aren’t the dancing type.

Zaku's avatar

Some do. I don’t.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@GladysMensch: “Red Right Hand” was a club favorite for our crowd.

zenvelo's avatar

I have always had a great time dancing at weddings. But the idea of karaoke would shift the focus from everyone having fun to having to watch someone murder a song. Keep the dancing, drop the singing for anyone but you, the pro singer, and the groom if he can sing.

YARNLADY's avatar

Do the bride and groom like dancing? Do their friends and members of the wedding party like to dance? Let the answers to these questions be your guide.

jca's avatar

I agree with @zenvelo: karaoke is something where most people are spectators, whereas dancing is something everyone can do.

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@YARNLADY: Yes, most of the crowd like or liked dancing. We’ve got a punk crowd, a goth crowd and then… the parents. Oy.

DarlingRhadamanthus's avatar

In my culture, you cannot have a wedding without music…and a lot of dancing. (The dancing ends when your uncle starts wearing the tablecloths as a skirt.) Not that we need an excuse to dance…or for music. We pretty much can start dancing in the aisles at Safeway, or sitting in traffic, or even listening to something at the dentist’s office.

I sang at my own wedding (in a time far, far away…that marriage is no more.) We sang a duet, actually.

Did you pick out a song yet? (I’m answering this a month later.)

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@DarlingRhadamanthus: For my first wedding, there was no dancing and I always regretted it. Most of the best energy weddings I’ve attended have had music so this time around I’m trying to get it going, even for our small crowd. We’re not going to sing to each other but we might sing along here and there ;) He can kind of carry a tune but I most definitely cannot.

DarlingRhadamanthus's avatar

@Neizvestnaya…Music is wonderful…even if it is only you and your sweetheart dancing (it won’t be, I promise). Somehow, the way you position things helps, too. For example, put the tables close to the dance floor (especially if it is only a small group). A lot of people are self-conscious about walking the “loooong way” to the dance floor. But if you put the tables in a circle round the dance floor, and make the dance area smaller (to accomodate the smaller crowd) it won’t be that far to walk and people will get up more readily. Don’t know how big your venue is, but a lot of venues spread out the tables to fill the hall, no matter how many people will be there. So, an idea is to make a larger venue smaller by positioning the tables so that they simply mark out a smaller space…and it’s then a more intimate space.

Whatever you do….remember…it’s your day, your way. When is it? Keep us posted. (If you’ve said when….I must not have seen the thread.) Every blessing and best wish to you!

Neizvestnaya's avatar

@DarlingRhadamanthus: The date is November 12th. You’ve given me a nice solution to not having a good surface to set up chairs for people to sit in front of the deck where we’ll exchange vows. Maybe we’ll use the dancefloor the set the chairs upon for the vows and then move them to the tables (set beside the dancefloor) for the reception dinner.

It will be a breeze for people to walk onto to dance but also for us to go to each table and me not sink into the grass with my heels. You jellies are going to get me through these last few months of wedding madness.~

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