I’d steal Triar Fuck’s virginity, giving it to Kevin Costner.

I’d steal all of Donald Trump’s money and give it to refugee and immigrant families.

I don’t want to be too specific but I’d target the big timers who walked off with tens or hundreds of $millions in the Delphi/GM bankruptcy and give it to the employees who lost their pensions.

Greedy slime like Jaytee Batmyburger and his cronies robbed shareholders and employees and walked away scot-free from an SEC investigation thanks to a team of lawyers funded by Delphi, the very company they raped.

I would target all of the Wall Street bankers and speculators that walked away from the economic crash that they caused without consequence, in some cases, even getting government bailout money.

I would put the money into a fund that would provide single payer health care for everyone, and would feed all the hungry.

I would steal your heart.

and eat it with some fava beans and some nice Chianti

I would rob ISIL and give the money to refugees. It’s rumored to have $500 million.

I’d steal from the miners and pastoralists and invest it in Indigenous health, homes and jobs.

I’d steal (back) from the bankers, anti-environmental billionaires, oil industry, GMO corporations, inhumane industrial farmers, medical industry profiteers, and other greedbag multi-national mega-corporations, and give to environmental organizations, clear energy researchers, and impoverished people, and the people ripped off by said companies.

I’d start with my ex-partner who stole a ton of cash from our company and take all his belongings and cash and give it to a Mission.

I would help the Communists stay true to the State and confiscate all personal wealth over $100,000 in China and Russia.
I’d spend as much as necessary buying Brazilian rain forest and paying the farmers and ranchers to abandon the land most recently cleared.

If there’s money left over, get back to me.

I’d find a way to give lots and lots to animal shelters and animal rescue organizations.

I’d steal every foreclosed home that’s sitting empty and make sure everyone – EVERYONE – has a roof over their heads that wants one.

I would steal from the drunk and give to the sober.

I would transfer the Koch Brother’s funds into financial categories.
Animal Welfare
Wildlife Conservation
Environmental Issues/Oceanic-Land-Atmospheric
Children/Family
Aid/Relief Services
Education
Governmental/World Issues
Liberal Lobbying/ Voter Registration World-Wide
Scientific Research/World Issues (Non Species Testing- Alternative Methodology)
Arts/Availability To More/Schooling
Academy/Think Tank To Practice/Correction World Health
Space Exploration/Travel
Scientific Experimentation Towards Head Combustion of Religious Fanatics Worldwide
Elder Care/ Revamping of Care Facilities as Non-Profit Basis
Housing For World wide Peoples/ Services for Ill, Unemployed, Homeless, Disabled
Spaying and Neutering of Feral Animals/ Agressive Individuals/ Purposefully Stupid Individuals and Voters, and (Blockage of Human Reproduction Abilities of Prior Mentions)
Care Facilities for Injured, Ill, Abused, Abandoned Animal/Humans, Rehab and Care /World.
A Grand Tour of Places Around the World & Financial Funding for Personal Causes and Friends/Family
A Really Bitchin’ Set of Wheels…

I would take the Congressional pension and retirement funds and use the proceeds to fund those who had their pensions stolen.

I would HELP @janbb steal all of Trump’s and money and give to refugee and immigrant families. That would be huuuuuuge!

Tempting to wipe out the entire treasury of North Korea and deposit it into the treasury of South Korea, just to shift the balance of power a wee bit in the area.

Oh to see Kim Jong Un’s tantrum when he discovers he has zero credit.

The Philippines could use a cash infusion?
Anyone?

And I’m still waiting for someone to suggest a way to put a crimp in Putin’s style.