There have been several times when I was very sick or the victim of crime bleeding out or with a gun to my head, and I honestly expected to be killed or die from my condition. And I honestly didn’t care. I only cared about what would happen to those whom I was responsible for, and what would happen to them, and how my sudden death would effect others, including the animal companions and wildlife I provide for.
What’s important about life or death is that you had a good life before you die, even if it was only a fraction of it.
The thing about suicide is, it only hurts those who actually care about you. It won’t make people who screwed you feel guilty. And even if it does, they will move on within a month or so. But for those who care about you, they will NEVER get over it and will be left not only with the horror and shock of that, but it will leave them with a lot of financial and paperwork and legal hardships.
Life is good, even if all you do is hang out at a grocery store with an empty shopping cart as if you are shopping, and offer it to some grateful person with an armload of slipping groceries they did not plan to get so much of. If its only to save the life of a creature such as an earthworm on the sidewalk that cannot even offer gratitude.
I was almost killed in a robbery in 2011. My dad, who was fairly normal, before the attempt on my life, has never been the same—NOW its like he;s an old man with Parkinsons. For over 36 hours I was not expected to survive and he prepared mentally for my death. It never happened obviously. But the shock still did damage to him.
The thing about Life after Death is, its still life and existence. Most people have a rather unrealistic expectation of what happens at death.
Total annihilation may be cool for some. For others, it may be Nirvana. But what good is not existing if you’re not around to enjoy it?