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kevbo1's avatar

How much money should I give my relative for concert tickets she couldn’t use?

Asked by kevbo1 (1731points) 2 weeks ago
16 responses
“Great Question” (0points)

My aunt is a single mom caring for a 30s has an adult child with autism (my cousin), and my cousin’s behavioral/emotional state has taken a recent dive such that my aunt couldn’t use some pricey ($280/2) concert tickets. Originally, she asked if I would take my cousin, but as my cousin’s emotional state got worse, she just offered them to me to take whoever I wanted, and my best option ended up being my sister.

The show was great, the seats were great, and it was a sold out show for a band I grew up with that I’m glad I got to see (sort of a bucket list show) but that I probably wouldn’t have sought out on my own. I’m not paying that kind of money for any concert ticket these days mainly because I’m older and not enamored with bands like I used to be.

So I’d just like a sounding board. . . I’d like to give her some money, and usually I have a gut feeling about how much is a good amount, but this time I don’t. (My sister got my aunt some merch but didn’t offer money.) What do you think?

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Answers

seawulf575's avatar

Most likely she will try to refuse any offer you make. She gave them away knowing they would have gone to waste anyway. But giving her something would be a kind gesture. I’d give her whatever you feel is appropriate, given how you like the show and how generous she was in giving the tickets away.

Also, if I were deciding to give her money for them, I’d have done it up front, but even now I wouldn’t take “no” for an answer. She’d end up with the money if I had to slip it into her purse or accidentally drop it on my way out the door.

kevbo1's avatar

@seawulf575, She’ll take any amount and any timing will be fine with her. I’ll zap her the money via an app. (just filling in blanks—thanks for responding)

KNOWITALL's avatar

It really depends on your financial situation but if it were me, and she’s a single mother with a special needs child, I’d reimburse her fully. Perhaps she could enjoy a different event as it sounds like she certainly deserves it.

janbb's avatar

if I weren’t going to give her the full amount, I think I would give $200 or so.

jca2's avatar

I’d give her $400 if you can afford it. If that’s more than you can spare, then @janbb‘s idea is a good one. If that’s more than you want to spend, get her a gift card to a restaurant for about $100.

gorillapaws's avatar

I’d pay full price if it was in my budget. Yes, you wouldn’t have spent that much or gone at all but for helping out, but you did go and that’s the face value of the tickets. She’s family and sounds like she could use the money (possibly more than you?).

If I didn’t have the financial means, I’d try to at least do half. You could logic your way to her gifting you one of the tickets, but you wanted to pay for yourself or whatever.

Caravanfan's avatar

I would give her face value for the tickets.

LuckyGuy's avatar

I would pay full value for the tickets and mention how much you enjoyed it.

If she refused the money I’d leave it somewhere where she will get it later.

JLeslie's avatar

Depends a little on her financial situation and yours. If I would never pay that much for tickets and would not usually give her money out of the blue just to be helpful, I would probably give her $200, or whatever I am usually willing to pay for show tickets.

If she has a tough financial situation and I had plenty of money, I would give more, or up to the actual value of the tickets.

People give away tickets here and they can actually get a “refund” it is actually a credit on their account for a future show at any of the theatres that our box office sells tickets for. Some people are happy to give, especially to family.

Edit: My guess is her financial situation is pretty good if she bought two tickets for $280 each. That is pretty steep.

janbb's avatar

@JLeslie My impression from the OP was that it was $280 for the two tickets but I could be wrong.

JLeslie's avatar

@janbb I read it again after your comment and I think you are correct. $140 a ticket still isn’t cheap, but it is not outlandish either.

I’d send her $100 or more, if I sent anything. Maybe the whole amount.

If I see her a lot I might pay for something else instead, like dinner one night.

jca2's avatar

@janbb I didn’t realize it was 280 for the two – I read it wrong. I change my answer. I originally said to pay 400. I’d offer the 280. 280 for two tickets is reasonable, as far as what I would be willing to pay first hand for a concert.

kevbo1's avatar

Thanks, everyone. I sent $280 based on some other factors even though I didn’t want to send that much. Lesson learned for next time.

LuckyGuy's avatar

@kevbo1 We’re proud of you!

KNOWITALL's avatar

@kevbo1 Stand up guy, right there. :)

kritiper's avatar

Full price, to be perfectly polite.

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