Thanks for the followup. I was thinking of this question last night and wanted to throw out another option and add some friendly (fatherly? grandfatherly?) advice.
A double date anywhere – yes, even a restaurant, is a good icebreaker and helps you get to know each other in a lower pressure setting. You can dial back your enthusiasm and let others talk without appearing to be a recluse or, at the other end of the spectrum, a motor mouth. You watch the conversation and see if the talking time is about equal. If not, occasionally ask the other, quieter people open ended questions.
Unless they are all in EMS do not tell war stories – even if you are asked directly. Save them for a private time when they will really count. (I have more than 2000 hours of active service and have hundreds of calls but I can only think of half a dozen that I consider worthy of discussion – the top few %)
A first date is your chance to learn about the other person so you can decide if there will be a second date. You already know about you. Spend the time seeing if you want to enjoy the company of the other person at a future time. See if he is polite, articulate, addicted, employed, active, intelligent, generous, groomed, educated, etc. – whatever characteristics you find important.
The date does not have to be long or go into the wee hours. Give yourself an early out up front by saying you have to get up early the next morning. A meal, anywhere, is just about the right length of time to see if there are deal breakers.
Here are some of mine, in no particular order:
If she answers a phone or texts without apologizing.
If she tells me about her cousin’s sister’s brother losing his job.
If she tells me something she is not supposed to tell.
If she is late and does not apologize.
If she is rude to the waitstaff.
If she does not at least offer to pay for some part of the meal.
If she did not give me a chance to speak.
If she smokes.
If she drinks too much.
Etc.
Make your own list and use the date time to find the answers so you can decide if want to be with this person a second time.
Enjoy.